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Gun lovers, rejoice. The altar has accepted the child sacrifice of 19 more kids in Americas favorite modern ritual: Watching monsters murder children with high caliber weapons, then, in an almost Olympic level fashion, collectively shrugging our shoulders, and doing nothing.
To be fair, we were overdue for witnessing our favorite past time. The Tops shooting was a couple days ago, and that's a long time to have to go without.
It's about as American as baseball, and apple pie.
In fact, we've almost turned this into something of a sport. With every mass shooting, Americans have a new excuse to hop onto Facebook and yell at each other. Everyone falls into their respective tribes, dukes it out on social media using the same arguments as the last time, until the conversation dies out and everyone simply moves on.
Until it happens again. And it does happen again. We are in a constant state of mass shootings happening again. And again, and again.
And those same people you see arguing about how horrific a mass shooting is, but don't believe they should lose their access to guns? They'll vote for the reps that caused this by blocking inaction on gun control.
Again.
We may not excel at a lot of things, like educating the population, or inventing new ideas, or paying workers a fair wage, or guaranteeing your retirement won't get wiped out in an economic crash, or manufacturing decent cars, or electronics, or figuring out healthcare...
But you know what we can do? What we are #1 in the world at?
Making sure you have a nice, cozy, family friendly place for your kids to get shot.
We've got that one down to a science.
You see, here in America, you are constantly reminded that every single right you have, every single freedom you enjoy, takes a back seat to our most important right of them all: The right for Billy Joe Jim Bob in Kentucky, to buy ammunition anytime he wants, without being questioned. Ever.
This takes precedent over you and your childrens safety in public. But Billy Joe Jim Bob, being the gracious angel that he is, is A-OK with that. Small price to pay for his freedom.
That, however, does not go far enough for Billy Joe Jim Bob. He believes, fully, as an American patriot, that any and every adult should be able to buy and own a high powered long rifle, for any reason, without being questioned. Full stop. It's the American way.
In fact, yesterday, Billy Joe Jim Bob saw the American dream realized for the 200th time in the year 2022. (There have been over 200 mass shootings in 2022)
Salvatore Ramos celebrated his 18th birthday in the most American way that any brand new adult possibly could: By walking into a gun store, buying two assault rifles (since he was 18, it was legal) a whole shit ton of ammunition, then waltzing into an elementary school and freeing 19 children from their mortal coil.
Then, after hearing about the shooting, Billy Joe Jim Bob expressed condolences for the victims on his Facebook page, but purported heavily that he refuses any sort of legislative change in regards to gun control, because that would make him pretty upset. As we established previously, we have to be very careful not to offend Billy Joe Jim Bob.
After all, he does have *a lot* of guns.
We all know Billy Joe Jim Bob. We all see him posting after every mass shooting.
We are all very used to the concept that every time someone dies to gun violence, Billy Joe Jim Bob is going to lose his voice, and temper, reminding you that the ultimate victim of mass shootings, is Billy Joe Jim Bob.
Billy Joe Jim Bob is the fervent republican voter that is holding the country hostage to a systemic cycle of gun violence.
How? Glad you asked.
House Bill 8 has been sitting in stalemate in Congress for over a year now.
HB8 is defined as follows, directly from the LegiScan website:
(HB8) Establishes new background check requirements for firearm transfers between private parties (i.e., unlicensed individuals). Specifically, it prohibits a firearm transfer between private parties unless a licensed gun dealer, manufacturer, or importer first takes possession of the firearm to conduct a background check. The prohibition does not apply to certain firearm transfers or exchanges, such as a gift between spouses in good faith.
If you're reading this, and think "that sounds reasonable", then I can't think of a single reason for you to ever vote for another republican again.
Why just republicans, you ask?
The vote distribution is (Democrat 208-3).
Two hundred and eight democrats voted for universal background checks.
Three republicans. Three entire republicans voted to make sure that your completely insane neighbor doesn't have access to weapons that belong in warzones.
Three.
Three.
The rest of the Republicans? Well, instead of voting for a safety measure that would protect kids in classrooms, they're busy taking slots on Fox News to make sure that Billy Joe Jim Bob remains in a perpetual state of rage over how the most recent mass shooting victimized him and his rights.
Because, Billy Joe Jim Bob watches Fox News religiously. He won't be tricked by the main stream media.
And the cycle continues. Again, and again, and again, and again.
I could go on and on about the usual suspects. Hell, Greg Abbot was on national television today, again, re-iterating his most closely clutched pearl: that gun violence is a result of a lack of mental healthcare, rather than access to firearms. Passing the buck to the mentally unwell, without doing anything tangible, again.
Again and again and again and again.
Every single time.
Realistically? That doesn't matter.
It does, but not as much as how Abbot influences the Billy Joe Jim Bobs that pop up on our Facebook feeds after ever major tragedy. Abbot, along with the rest of the republicans, would have no ability to make superfluous statements like this, on national television, if he lost his pipeline to the anger and rage trigger in Billy Joe Jim Bobs brain, that manipulates him into voting for Abbot every election.
So what do we do about Billy Joe Jim Bob?
Other than burning Fox News to the ground, I have no idea.
So I'll leave it off with this:
"If you want a better country, be a better citizen"
-Jim Wright, AKA @Stonekettle on Twitter